They think it's all over...

My students sat their TOEFL yesterday, which ostensibly means that my work with them is now done. In reality though the course runs until May 7th, so the period between now and then becomes an exercise in creative thinking in order to keep them in school. This is not too difficult a task though; Roland is organising a trip to the Pingualit Crater at the weekend, and the end of next week marks the start of the Easter break, so in effect I only really have three weeks of class to organise.

I would love to be going on the excursion to the crater but, unfortunately, duty requires me to stay behind. A few of the students aren't going on the trip and will remain at the residence as they are flying home this weekend as opposed to next, and with Roland gone the building would otherwise be unstaffed (is that a word?), so yours truly will be holding the fort much like the character in a disaster movie who sacrifices himself in some heroic manner so that the main cast can escape to safety.

Speaking of disaster movies, we watched 2012 in class today as a post-TOEFL treat and, in the words of Ron Livingston in Office Space, it was everything that I thought it could be. Those of you reading this who know me well will understand that director Roland Emmerich made this film specifically for me, and he certainly didn't disappoint. I was already exhausted after the first hour, and as the film reached its climax I actually felt relieved that I didn't see it at the cinema as I honestly don't think my body would have stood up to the audio-visual pummelling afforded by a big screen, and would have simply liquified before the end credits began to roll.

As it was I came out alive (unlike most of the cast), and I was able to console those students who fear they may not have passed the TOEFL with the fact that it doesn't really matter as we only have a couple of years to live anyway, unless of course we manage to befriend John Cusack in that time.

Aren't I an inspiration?

Boyled over

Hot on the heels of Adam Lambert's shock defeat in the final of American Idol comes the news that Susan Boyle, she of a multi-million YouTube hits, has also failed to win the talent show that made her name. She was beaten in the final of Britain's Got Talent by a street dance group called Diversity, who now take away £100,000 (about $175,000) and the chance to perform at the Royal Variety Show in December.

I doubt whether this will be the end for Ms Boyle though, especially when one considers that the winners of shows like these often aren't the ones to go on and and have a meaningful career. Indeed, I saw Simon Cowell interviewed on Craig Ferguson's late night chat show this week, where he stated that he would be very interested in securing the movie rights to Susan Boyle's rise to fame, which would undoubtedly prove to be a very nice money spinner for both parties; in fact, I wouldn't be surprised if Simon's already begun negotiations.

Which all leads to the question: who will play the part of Susan Boyle in such a movie, assuming that she doesn't play herself? As I've said before, I think that there's actually more than a passing resemblance between Simon and Susan, but I doubt whether Mr Cowell would be interested in taking the part as he wouldn't be able to wear any of his trademark skin-tight T-shirts.

So, who could it be? How about one of the following:

The Susan Boyle Story - what price on it being titled 'I Dreamed A Dream?' - coming soon to a cinema near you.

I can't wait.

To boldly go...

Three days after my last post and I'm just about over my cold, so I guess the swines didn't get me. I was well enough to take the car in for servicing on Friday, and whilst driving is definitely one thing that I miss when I'm in the North, I could do with out having to pay excessively for the privilege. All four tires (that's how we spell it in Canada) needed replacing as well, but seeing as they resembled the automotive equivalent of Jean-Luc Picard, they had to 'baldly' go.

Talking of Star Trek (nice segue, eh?), I saw the new film today, and I must say that I left the cinema with mixed feelings. As a standalone piece of science-fiction movie making it was highly acceptable, but as a chapter in the existing Trek canon, it simply didn't cut it for me. Whilst there were some nice references to the original series - "I'm a doctor Jim, not a physicist!", "I'm giving you all she's got captain!" and even the inevitable death of a red shirted security guard - there were simply too many anomalies for the film to fit in the established Trek timeline. Without wishing to give too much away, this is (kind of) explained during the film, but for me there is a kind of Da Vinci Code feeling about it all; most friends who had read Dan Brown's book didn't care too much for the film whereas people like me, who hadn't read it, really liked the movie version. In the case of Star Trek, substitute original series for the book and you get the idea.

Whatever my personal feelings about Star Trek though, I think the franchise will be boldly going in its new form for a few years yet, in spite of the fact that the bridge of the Enterprise now looks like an intergalactic branch of the Apple store. Director JJ Abrams has taken his own Kobayashi Maru test and just about passed it by applying his own form of original thinking, and a (star)fleet of sequels is now a certainty.

Take us away Mr Sulu, warp factor three...